This is 40.

Yesterday was my 40th birthday.

For me, major birthdays were 16, 18, 21, 30, 32 (like that number), and 40.  Each of these birthdays, I thought my life would be in a certain place and seemingly things usually do not turn out the way I thought.  For example, for 30, I thought I would enter that decade with fierceness, but I had a liver resection 2 days after my 30th birthday to remove a baseball size tumor.  Here at 40, I thought I would be a certain point in my career, business, and family.  But I’ve been recently laid off and have yet to be married.

What I thought and what actually is conflict with each other.  But, I’m perfectly okay with that, because of what I do know.

There is a difference between think and know.  To think is to have a particular belief or idea.  To know is to be aware through observation, inquiry or information; to have developed a relationship with someone through meeting and spending time.

I have a hand full of gray strands, but I know 40 is far from being old.  I know my son is a phenomenal young man and I’m so blessed and honored to be his mom.  I know that I have an incredible family and wonderful friends and even some pretty decent associates.  The information I have from Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end,” lets me know the purpose God has for me will come to pass.

I may not be where I thought I would be at 40, but I know I’m where God planned for me to be.  His ways are not my ways.  I trust Him.  I’m excited to be entering this decade and looking forward to what He has for me.  I’m thankful for the 40 years to date and I press towards living life on purpose, for purpose.  This is 40.

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